Run run run

Tired and bummed. Applied for two more informaticist positions at current hospital and wasn't even called for an interview--the posts have been filled. Feel like I am hitting my head against a wall. Am leaning more and more to moving myself southward. 10 years of seniority will go. Emailed the HR director here to see what holdups there may be. Also have to look at my personnel file. It's not like the team doesn't know who I am am--I did my practicum there for heaven's sake. And maybe that's the problem. They know me. Don't know what I may have done to hack them off, but I can't think of any other explanation--maybe there really is a whole favoritism thing between the sister hospitals. Who knows? Have been applying for two years.

Another bummer. Antioch raised tuition--now over 8 grand for the first kid, over 7 for the second. No way we can afford that even when we are done with our debt management program. So moving to the south end of town is looking more and more like the plan. Am ready for a regular job--one that happens in the daytime where I am home every evening. And holidays. So will keep plugging away--and hope something breaks soon.

There is no walking

She doesn't walk. She shimmies, climbs, spins, skips or jumps. Furniture is no impediment. She just goes over it. If it as a support she has to stand on it. The kitchen chair beams are frequent roosts. There is a persistent bounce when she moves forward, but even moving forward requires movement side to side. It seems to be all in the hips. I never notice much with the arms.

Today it is red tights, magenta skirt and lavender long sleeve tee. They should all clash, but to know her, it works perfectly fine. And makes me smile.

She gave me a gift this morning. Yesterday it was an "infinity of kisses". Today it is a pendant, a small inexpensive kind that comes with her little pet books. But it is wrapped in a cherished swatch of fabric and given with some gravity. She gives all the time.

The joys of being a mother to a 6 year old girl.

A cold?

Charlotte started with the runny nose a few days ago and it went directly to croup. 4 am we tried the steamy shower, which after a bit she didn't like. It helped, but then it got worse- so off to the ER. Luckily no breathing treatment, just an oral steroid. She was quite chatty to the ER nurse at 0500 and he wanted to know if she had had her coffee already. No sir, that's how she is. Her runny nose is now cleared up and Ryan has started. The humidifier has moved from her room to his. He takes his cold like me. Goes right for the throat and makes him croaky. Once again, the great flu immunization debate...I have to get one for B North or wear a mask for 2 months. Will likely get the mist for the kids. Sick kids are a misery.Have to wait for the colds to clear up completely. Rained today, the snow continues to melt. It's a weather lottery every day.

The house is slowly shaping up. I finally convinced Greg to get rid of our entertainment center and just yesterday he gave me permission to get rid of our 20 year old Magnavox! So the fireplace room is the emptiest we've ever had it. Now if only I could get rid of that couch... Books are everywhere. It will be a major undertaking to go through them all and pass some along, but the shelves are overwhelmed. I have pared mine down enormously--it's mostly the kids stuff now. I no longer feel the need to buy books--I actually let my BN membership lapse for the first time in 15 years. I don't buy books anymore. Am actually looking at a Nook--I can download ebooks from the library on to it!! Greene county has quite a few, but I figure memberships toi Montgomery county and Centerville libraries will help!

I start hospital wide orientation at B North next week. Hooray! Have to spread it out over two periods since I am still part -time at the View. Can't wait to cut down to 2 nights a week!!

Snowflakes

Was picking up the kids the other day and it began to snow. I was wearing my burgundy down filled parka and it was just cold enough to hear the snow lightly pelt the surface of the jacket. I have always heard that snowflakes have unique shapes. This day's were delightful. Perfect little flowers. absolutely adorable. Six little circular petals. I regret my phone could not take a close picture!

January 9, 2011

It's Sunday and we are all home with no place special to be. It's a wonderful feeling! Made waffles this morning with the waffler Ryan received from Jo for Christmas. I had hot fresh coffee and some eggs--time to watch the carbs again! The kids are playing well together. Greg slept in a little. It is very cold, no snow has melted. Yesterday was busy...Ryan's first Junior First lego League meeting followed by an art class at K12. This month's classes focus on some pottery. I am very excited about next month's as they focus on draw cartoons--Ryan loves to draw and enjoys adding conversation bubbles--so this should make him happy! After all of that we had Amanda and her two kids, Autumn and Donnie come over and hang out. Great visit. Great people!

In other news, I am taking a casual position at Bethesda North--4 shifts in 6 weeks and cutting down to part-time at Southview. B North is coming up with Epic in the next year and the nurse manager on labor and delivery knows I want in! I still owe Kettering some time (quite a bit actually) so we'll see how things pan out. If I go full time at B North I hope we can move at least to Centerville to cut down on the commute--Greg would still need to commute to Wright Patt. If we stay in glorious Fairborn, Greg has consented to send the kids back to Antioch--it would be 4th and 5th for Ryan and 3rd on for Charlotte--hopefully they will have room! You can appreciate how much of a stress reliever this is for me. We haven't told the kids and likely won't until we get closer. If we end up moving, the schools in Centerville are decent and there are private options as well. I am itching to get out of Kettering altogether...

Ryan joined Junior First Lego League--after some confusion with the coordinator, he joined yesterday. He said he wasn't sure if he could meet more new people but he is delighted after going. They learned about simple machines yesterday and he needs to get more practice building with gears. The team's challenge is something about building something to help the body move. Ryan is supposed to research tools used to fix cavities--one of several exercises the kids are doing to narrow down what they will build. We also enrolled both kids in an art program that looks totally awesome. This month they are working with clay, next they are leaning to draw cartoons with a villain theme. they meet every Sat for 2 hours. So life is busy again.

Job hunting--ugh.

Went to an interview at an extremely spiffy and on the ball unit today. They are so on the ball that it is actually intimidating, coming from a facility that really...isn't. Up side, it is a great unit. downside, it is an HOUR away. No shortcuts, a flat hour, mostly interstate. Plus it is a casual position with call. So I can cut back to part time at my current place and work a few days a month at the new place. It's do-able--but it already sounds exhausting. The perk would hopefully be to get on the informatics team as the hospital there moves to an EHR. But , no promises and I'm not even sure I impressed them enough. I have even applied for a position in Colorado but the manager is "reviewing my application." I may never hear back. So after being in the car for 2 hours and having the rest of the afternoon to think about it, I wonder if perhaps I am picking the hard road and maybe this whole full time informatics gig may be something that has to wait. I picked up the kids from school and realized that I really would much much rather be home. I don't really want to be a corporate mom. Finances necessitate my working now, but in another year I can go part-time at my current place. and be home more, and be available for practice and scouts and you know, living. I am more thankful than ever that I have a job--I've been looking for another and it is so hard. So for now, I'll stick with the place I know--even though it can drive me crazy...

Grandma Christine

Grandma Christine was my mother's mother. It is my understanding that she returned with my grandfather from Germany during or after World War II. She kept her heavy German accent during her life in the states. Of all of my memories of her, the one that recently emerged was of how she rubbed our faces gently with her knuckles and tsked in adoration--a way saved for grandmothers who adore their grandchildren, I suppose. She loved doing it, it was a daily occurrence whenever she was with us. I am reminded of it now because I do it with my own children--without the tsking, but I can't resist gently rubbing their cheeks with the back of my fingers. I wonder if she was as fascinated with the warm smooth suppleness of a child's face as I am or if she just loved rubbing our freckles? It doesn't hurt that now they are the perfect height for this and for now, they tolerate it. Whatever the reason, I now get more pleasure in this simple gesture because most of the time when I rub Ryan and Charlotte's cheeks, I am reminded of Grandma Christine and her love for me. I wonder if the kids will remember too?