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Cookbook

I enjoy cookbooks. I really enjoy America's Test Kitchen. My mother-in-law turned us on to it several years ago. The recipes are foolproof if followed correctly--they are tested dozens of times--hence the name--but for that you get wonderful dishes. This is the latest--I occasionally thin out the collection, but the ATK's stay. They have 2 shows, America's Test Kitchen and Cook's Country. I DVR them both and then am gidy when I can watch! Ryan enjoys them as well. He discovered triple chocolate mousse cake and requested it for his birthday.

Like quilting fabric and sewing projects, cookbooks thrill me. The beautiful pictures with instructions promising that you too can create this mouthwatering dish:) Most recipes are lengthy and require minute amounts of ingredients that are hard to save because they van only be bought in larger quantities. But, for a free morning or afternoon, I can dedicate myself and every pot and pan I own (really, does anyone not do this?) to create a home cooked meal for my family. It brings immense satisfaction that I was able to select the best of each ingredient to create a wholesome meal. I am usually too tired at this point to clean up:) But the dishes can wait. It's time to eat!

Trounced

Today was Ryan's first tournament as a select soccer player! I got to experience it as a parent this time instead of a player. I think I prefer the player experience. They were trounced. Trounced soundly once and then trounced even worse the second game. Second game was 12-0. There are many reasons why this happened and it was an interesting experience for me as a parent. Keeping quiet when frustrated was a test today so I decided to stop being frustrated. They have a coach and screaming parents don't help anyway. Not strangling the other teams parents was harder. Comments like "I'm starting to feel sorry for them" particularly grated. But our boys didn't run as much as they should have. It wasn't a case if they tried their best and failed. A few just didn't have their heads in the game-my boy included. They can and have been much more tenacious with the ball. The other coach finally his boys to stop shooting the ball. Our boys coach did a good job though.The boys weren't particularly downtrodden. They have a long way to go. For several this is their first select experience. In a few months they will be better and next season better still. Now, I get to learn how to be supportive while also communicating the need for him to try. He knows what it feels like to lose. I think every kid needs that. I can't convince him to try if he wants to win. He has to figure that out on his own.

Cats

So yes, there is a story as to why we have 2 cats. My super softie heart and Greg's ultimate love for me:)  Found the orange cat on the way home from work one night (1 am)--he was wandering down a usually busy road and didn't flinch as the van came near. He was so skinny and then he came right to me. I couldn't leave him so brought him home. Argument ensued as to the proper placement of the cat--which at that point was not the house. He went back out on the stoop and back into the world where I was sure he would be roadkill or caught by some torturous fiends. I seriously had nightmares about it. He ended up wandering up to the kids a few days later as I was cleaning windows. After several hours, Greg relented. I went looking for him and apparently whispering "here kitty kitty" can get you more than you bargained for. I was overjoyed at the sound of mewing but was struck dumb when I turned a saw a wee kitten instead of my skinny tom. Didn't plan on keeping both, but they have turned out to have lovely dispositions. Vet visit conformed the orange tom was sick--he was sneezing and hacking blood. He is now on antibiotics for an upper respiratory infection. The kitten is in perfect shape and asserted his personality early--he is called Rascal. The other fellow is really mellow. He spent his first two days here by the toilet curled up and sleeping--vet said he was 2 pounds underweight and about 7 months old. So I think he was just exhausted. He still sleeps alot, but comes out more to be petted and is truly content when he is laying on me. He is called Westley after the Princess Bride--though I would really love Dread Pirate Roberts--that may be a bit of a mouthful. So I am now in the midst of controlling the waste and stench the comes with two intact male cats. The litterboxes are an ongoing battle--and I think the orange tom is marking in one corner. They are set up to be neutered in September.

So how is Charlie with all of this? He is doing well altogether. He likes to paw the kitten and Westley hisses at him when he gets too annoyed. So we don't leave them all unattended. I love having warm beasties to pet.

Pictured are the boys in the beds Charlotte made. The kids are delighted. Hearing the glee was they laugh at the kitten lightens my heart.

Sunday at the bookstore

 Here's Ryan reading a Star Wars encyclopedia. Yes, another one. He and I came so I could return my Nookcolor, an extravagance I don't need but it sure was nice on vacation:) Put it in the bin of things to get in a few more months. Yesterday was a biggish day. Greg was off to a Court of Honor for a scout troop he works with. He had asked if he could go and then I was offered a chance to pick up a shift at the hospital. I said no to the shift and Greg went. He had a lovely time and in addition to speniding time with some really nice people, made a connection for blackberry wine that another adult leader is making. Yay for us!

I mentioned before that it has been a lean couple of months and we aren't done just yet. More hours are coming just as the kids are starting school. So I am not super worried. We are hopeful for a job change for Greg that in addition to increasing his job satisfaction, will also bring a raise. Just a few more months to hang on! So as I battle the bank account I have to remember what the trade off is. My being home meant Greg could go to his event. It meant we were able to take a walk today. We can eat meals together today. It meant that I realized how much Ryan was marking his days with the DS, the Wii and watching clone wars! So the breaking point...

We settled down for family movie night and no one could agree. Plus the kids had watched a movie the night before with a sitter. So I cancelled it and told them electronics were done for the foreseeable future. So no DS this morning. When he woke up though he inhaled his breakfast in preparation for it. Then he was reminded. In the past he had to eat before he played so he would gobble whatever was easy to meet the requirement. He also stopped sticking to the 30 minute limit. And yes, my fault too, that sometimes it was just easier to let him play. Grumping was minimal. But I wonder if he is laying in wait:) I have a sitter coming this week as I have to put in a few hours. She has already been told no movies wii or DS. This may be a challenge for her too!

Today I am already noticing a change. He ran with Charlie on his walk, something he usually doesn't do. Usually I am dealing with the post "turn off your game" grumpiness. I don't know if all kids are this way, but he really has a hard time walking away from movies, tv and video games--I have been told I was much the same as a kid.  What started out as a treat turned into a routine. They will likely be DS free next summer--as they were last summer.

So we went to the bookstore. I got a small coffee, he a hot chocolate. A treat I am willing to indulge. He was told I wasn't buying anything--though he asked twice anyway. So we left and came home and had some lunch. The time is now--resetting boundaries. And instead of fighting me every step, they are adapting. As I consider the next steps, I have to remind myself of what the tradeoffs are.  How being home more is actually what will make me happiest. It's amazing how hard that seems right now. I will continue with full time hours at least until January--if the kids are okay, will go thru June and then cut back. These last few months may be the hardest--as we are so close to accomplishing such an enormous goal!

Back from Cali

The difficulty of staying in one hotel room with kids is that the lights go out pretty much when they are in bed. I can't read, nevermind type in a bed. I am programmed to fall asleep there, period. So no blogging while away. It was a fast trip to Cali and I know Greg's grandmother enjoyed every minute of her 5 day long birthday celebration. We went to Cali sans Disney and Knotts this time and actually didn't have time to go to the beach. In addition to visiting with family, we were able to carve out part of a day to visit old friend about 40 minutes away. The jet lag hit all of us harder this time. We slept til 11 the first day home, the kids until almost 10 today. We will slowly roll it back but it is a struggle to keep the days easy when we can go to swim lessons at 10-we just have to get out of bed! I have bought the dreaded school supplies and after a trip to the CMC ER--yes another one, made it back to Kroger to finish grocery shopping. Ryan was complaining of sharp chest pain--he had a similar episode this spring. It faded to a dull roar but I didnt want to chance it. CMC cleared him of cardiac issues--they feel it is likely muskuloskeletal or GERD--since it is short lived and seems to resolve on its own. I just keep having images of basketball players collapsing on the court in high school. At this moment, he is sitting close to me totally engrossed in Harry Potter book 3. Watching his face is a little fun. You can read every emotion as it crosses his face. He worries and smiles and is showing almost as much dedication to this series as all of the Star Wars stuff. Charlotte is reading the Mercy Watson series and I love listening to her read aloud. She started gymnastics last week. She'll go an hour a week and the first class was stellar. They had them walk on the low and high beam, swing on a rope, learn the first steps of the cartwheel, and jump on a vault--all with close supervision:) I hope the class continues to be as great. Charlotte has bloomed more in the last couple of months, showing a creativity and bravery with her body that she previously didn't. She embraces her "homework", planting her hands on the floor and walking up the wall backwards!

I have done about 6 loads of laundry--they wait to be folded. We are slowly getting ready for the fall. I a glad that I stayed part time at the hospital. It has been a lean couple of months, but it will pay off this fall as I will be available for more stuff while picking up hours here and there while the kids are in school.  I have asked the kids what they want to do for Halloween--it is time to start looking forward a bit in earnest. I must peruse girl scout training and get Ryan's soccer schedule. Piano will start up at some point. Luckily, they love scouts and piano and the sports they have chosen, so the running around is at least rewarding. Greg is interviewing, so prospects for him are looming a little brighter. I have learned in the past 2 years that one of the greatest driving forces on this earth is hope. Hope and perseverance. This may all actually start to come together!

New Cast

Ryan went for his 3 week check up and an xray confirmed bone healing and that he could progress to a short cast. I was so thankful he and Greg got out of camp with enough time for a shower. I had horrid dreams about walking in to the waiting room with this boy that hadn't showered in 4 days. Plus I had been told that the smell when the cast comes off can burn your nostrils. So yay for showers! And yes, he was a little dirty--his feet were the worst!

On our last visit, when they mentioned gore-tex as part of his cast, I was envisioning a kind of rubbery stuff--it turned out to look like white paper with square bubbles in it, It was then wrapped in fiberglass (the lime green this time). So he can swim in the pool, ocean, lake whatever. He just has to rinse it inside and out with tap water when he's done. They cut the old one off with a electric saw--it was hard to watch, probably harder to tolerate--visions of screaming and blood spurting abounded (at least by me). 1 more week of no soccer (he's still healing!). 3 weeks in this cast and then he's done. His arm looked pale and a little thinner--yes, you can tell even on him, There is still a pronounced bump--but I was assured this was normal on skinny kids--just easier to see. His elbow was a bit stiff--also normal. Tomorrow we jaunt to LA and no we aren't packed!

Single parent. Single child. At least for the next 4 days. I am finding I have less time to do things by myself. She has no one to distract he but me! So of course I am thinking of all the times I wanted t spend time with her. And I am thinking about the laundry and hanging curtains. Today dishes and laundry will be done. But that's it. Today we will read and play. Early today: "mommy? Can I sit on your lap and put my cheek next to yours?"

Facebook Friends

I enjoy Facebook. It has allowed me to connect with friends I don't get to see often and allows me to catch up on acquaintances from long ago. Nostalgia can be sweet. And I have to admit I like the validation I receive from my posts and adoration from pictures of my kids. I don't like that my friends kids are on it and am questioning the friends' sanity for letting them on at all. As far as kids go, Facebook to me is one more internet danger-zone for kids. Ryan and Charlotte do not have accounts. They aren't getting accounts. A handful of their friends already do and Ryan at least has expressed his frustration at being held back. I have had to explain more than once, that the internet is just one big group of people. Some he knows, some he doesn't. Some are nice and some really aren't. And on the internet, Mommy and Daddy aren't standing next to him to protect him from strangers. And I do NOT want to have to contend with cyber bullying anytime soon.  Ryan wants a computer in his room. He has an ipod. And for now, that's all he's getting. He checks his email with me nearby and plays on very few approved websites. He's not ready to be turned loose on the net. And for now, I can control that.

Ryan's Birthday Party

After Laser Quest

            Ryan has been planning his birthday party for the last several months. He wanted to keep it small (yay!) And he was careful to choose things that his friends would want to do--right down to the movie. I had to ask Max's Mom is it was okay for him to watch Star wars--you know because he's only 7..., and the snacks and the games... but even with the planning--at one point he wanted me to buy Twinkies so he could "sample them" we could not have foreseen the broken arm. It was up in the air for a few days whether he would be able to do Laser Quest. So we had to come up with plan B. Moving the party to a later date was out of the question! Ryan would be in a short cast then, but he couldn't bear not to see his friends (and get their presents any longer). So he devised games--hence the pin the tail on the donkey and play Wii on the schedule, And then we were cleared by the doc and also by Laser quest so as of Friday afternoon, Laser quest was on! And I was saved from having to create a pin the tail on the donkey, wookie, ewok or even Charlie game (all were suggested!).

Max and Ryan studying the Star Wars Quiz book

Donnie and Zeb on the hammock--relaxing like the cool dudes they are

So 3 little boys came with sleeping bags and knapsacks and we were off. Laser Quest was a blast (according to the boys, at least) I ate a nice dinner and read in the car:) I had worked the night before and Greg was more than game to go play. Home for pizza, the triple chocolate mousse cake (it really was sinful) and of course, presents. To his delight, all were Star Wars themed. The boys all readily agreed on Mulan for the movie, while eating gobs of buttered popcorn, a bag of Chex Mix and Goldfish--all on Ryan's list. I chuckled to myself and only shared with Greg and one other parent that the boys had chosen essentially a Disney Princess movie:) It really is delightful how happy they were playing with each other and just being together watching a movie from the library. I wonder if I will always have it so easy? They went to bed at 10:30 without a peep and were up (with the Bop-It) at 6:30. Pancakes, chocolate chip and plain were inhaled and out into the yard they went with Charlie. A little later they came in to build Legos and their parents collected them around 10. All in all, Ryan did a great job and had a great time.

 

Building the Legos Sunday. They teamed up and got one done

My little boy officially turns 9 in about 18 hours, but he will insist it happened while he was sleeping. I am still trying to convince them that birthdays are all about the mom, but they aren't buying that either!

Happy Birthday, Sweet Ryan!!

Traveling with boys

Greg and I took Ryan and 3 friends to Laser Quest as part of Ryan's birthday plan. Perhaps it is with small groups of young kids, or maybe it's just boys--I'll let you know after I travel with a group of girls. But they were just hysterical. They would finish each other's sentences, jump in wherever and say the funniest stuff! I also learned very quickly (before reaching Indian Ripple at least) that the adult's job was not to contribute in ANY way to the conversation--they just stop and look at you. Our job is to be nearby if needed and listening is really just a huge perk!

What's in a name?

I've known for awhile that Sarai is a variation of my name. Just learned it means "quarrelsome" which actually seems more fitting than "princess". Hmmm.

Busy reading

Of all the things I have taught my children, using reading as a tool to keep busy has been one of the most valuable. It was a concept introduced to me by my friend Charlotte. Until then, I thought the kids had to be entertained on long trips with videos. Lucklily, I met her while the kids were still young enough to be weaned from in car videos pretty quickly. Now books go everywhere. Here Ryan sits reading a comic while wating for AAA to replace a flat on the van. He is engaged and the time is passing without complaint. I am so thankful that they love to read and that we didn't gave in to electronic gizmos to keep them busy!

Mama bear

Have discovered nothing causes more stress than having your kid out in the world and the world sucker punches her. Over the course of the last 2 months, there have been two instances where Charlotte has felt threatened/afraid at school and it's because of one other child. 2 months ago this child told Charlotte it was the there was man waiting in the sewer killing little girls and telling Charlotte she was next. A barrage of meetings with teachers and counselors to discover he had gotten it from a movie. This time it was the same child telling Charlotte he was going to kill one of her friends because that friend "cheated on him." Keep in mind this child is 6 or 7. And I have no idea what he watches or sees at home. All I know is my child has started complaining that her stomach hurts before school and that we are having conversations about having a clear line of communication with her teacher when she feels uncomfortable. The counselor told us that she had told Charlotte that there are people in the world who say bad things and we just have to do our best to get through it. That's when I got angry. Just deal with it. That was the message given to her. Just found out from her teacher that this child was suspended for three days because of this and his mother was mad at the school. Three weeks of school left this year. Am seriously considering pulling her out now. Debating homeschooling (again) and if we can afford me to be part-time. What a headache.

She is a butterfly

So Charlotte is 6 (7 this summer) and experience has taught us not to fret, that the game will eventually click. It took Ryan until last fall (age 8) so for now we can enjoy Charlotte's playing of the game. Where Ryan runs to get the ball, Charlotte kind of flits and flutters--we call it her "butterfly thing". While Ryan is kicking goals, we are delighted and so proud when Charlotte kicks the ball. Just touches it with her foot. She runs fast because she knows she is supposed to, though she may not really know why. Or if she knows why, she may not care. And really, her run is kind of a gallop...Which is okay. She still likes to go and she likes to practice.

Love watching him run

Last season it finally clicked. Ryan started understanding the nuances of the game and became more aggressive and eager to learn the game of soccer. It was a treat to watch him in the fall and again this spring. There is talk of letting him try out for select in the fall...we'll see. We will likely put him in soccer camp this summer. He is fast and those long legs carry him far! He is more agile on his feet and moves the ball better. He's improving. I love watching him run!

Spring is here..along with some reality

Today is one of those beautiful days! A hammock day! And I'm typing a blog. Walked Charlie to the park and back and am mentally revving up for the girl scout meeting tonight (I touch on camping) and the cub scouts--we are doing art. I am bring a cobbler to make in the dutch oven over the open fire at girl scouts:) Our first camporee is coming up Mother's day weekend--I wonder how many have been camping before and I wonder how I will manage my first girl scout trip as an adult--and in a lodge no less:( I'll touch on those thoughts another time.

I felt I should share a dramatic shift in thinking that has taken hold in the last weeks. Whether it's the economy, the results of an abysmal job search and humiliating HR experience, more friendships and ties here or a combination of all of the above--I have come to a place where I am ready to make a life...here. Not Cincinnati. Not Centerville or Kettering, or Yellow Springs. Here. This last year has been very hard. I didn't expect finding another job to be so frustrating and difficult. It makes me thankful that I have a job now to pay the bills! The kids are in soccer and scouts are making more ties in school. The realization came that even if I was GIVEN a job in Cinci tomorrow--I couldn't take it. We can't move, I am unwilling to commute 2 hours a day. Our house and day to day running of events is crazy. One of us needs to be home more. We have put everything on hold with the hope that we could leave. And I am tired of putting everything on hold. We need to find a church to go to. I want to build a playhouse for the kids. The house isn't bad and we will be in a place fairly soon to make it better. We'll be in a place where i can work part-time and keep up with our living space! Greg agrees (though still wants out of the house). But he agrees. And I have found a measure of peace. A couple of my work friends say I am giving up. Maybe. But working part time and having more time to do life sounds really appealing. Hopefully Murphy's law will STAY AWAY and I will not be offered a great job full-time. I have made peace with a different path. All it took was time and some harsh realities. I still have my degree, no one can take that away. The allure of a better job remains. But not here. At some point we may go. I hope then it won't be such a fight or seem so insurmountable.

Run run run

Tired and bummed. Applied for two more informaticist positions at current hospital and wasn't even called for an interview--the posts have been filled. Feel like I am hitting my head against a wall. Am leaning more and more to moving myself southward. 10 years of seniority will go. Emailed the HR director here to see what holdups there may be. Also have to look at my personnel file. It's not like the team doesn't know who I am am--I did my practicum there for heaven's sake. And maybe that's the problem. They know me. Don't know what I may have done to hack them off, but I can't think of any other explanation--maybe there really is a whole favoritism thing between the sister hospitals. Who knows? Have been applying for two years.

Another bummer. Antioch raised tuition--now over 8 grand for the first kid, over 7 for the second. No way we can afford that even when we are done with our debt management program. So moving to the south end of town is looking more and more like the plan. Am ready for a regular job--one that happens in the daytime where I am home every evening. And holidays. So will keep plugging away--and hope something breaks soon.

There is no walking

She doesn't walk. She shimmies, climbs, spins, skips or jumps. Furniture is no impediment. She just goes over it. If it as a support she has to stand on it. The kitchen chair beams are frequent roosts. There is a persistent bounce when she moves forward, but even moving forward requires movement side to side. It seems to be all in the hips. I never notice much with the arms.

Today it is red tights, magenta skirt and lavender long sleeve tee. They should all clash, but to know her, it works perfectly fine. And makes me smile.

She gave me a gift this morning. Yesterday it was an "infinity of kisses". Today it is a pendant, a small inexpensive kind that comes with her little pet books. But it is wrapped in a cherished swatch of fabric and given with some gravity. She gives all the time.

The joys of being a mother to a 6 year old girl.

A cold?

Charlotte started with the runny nose a few days ago and it went directly to croup. 4 am we tried the steamy shower, which after a bit she didn't like. It helped, but then it got worse- so off to the ER. Luckily no breathing treatment, just an oral steroid. She was quite chatty to the ER nurse at 0500 and he wanted to know if she had had her coffee already. No sir, that's how she is. Her runny nose is now cleared up and Ryan has started. The humidifier has moved from her room to his. He takes his cold like me. Goes right for the throat and makes him croaky. Once again, the great flu immunization debate...I have to get one for B North or wear a mask for 2 months. Will likely get the mist for the kids. Sick kids are a misery.Have to wait for the colds to clear up completely. Rained today, the snow continues to melt. It's a weather lottery every day.

The house is slowly shaping up. I finally convinced Greg to get rid of our entertainment center and just yesterday he gave me permission to get rid of our 20 year old Magnavox! So the fireplace room is the emptiest we've ever had it. Now if only I could get rid of that couch... Books are everywhere. It will be a major undertaking to go through them all and pass some along, but the shelves are overwhelmed. I have pared mine down enormously--it's mostly the kids stuff now. I no longer feel the need to buy books--I actually let my BN membership lapse for the first time in 15 years. I don't buy books anymore. Am actually looking at a Nook--I can download ebooks from the library on to it!! Greene county has quite a few, but I figure memberships toi Montgomery county and Centerville libraries will help!

I start hospital wide orientation at B North next week. Hooray! Have to spread it out over two periods since I am still part -time at the View. Can't wait to cut down to 2 nights a week!!